Deep Relaxation Before Sleep: A Body Scan You Can Do in Bed

It is two in the morning and your body is exhausted, but your mind is holding a meeting. Yesterday's conversation, tomorrow's deadline, something you said in 2014. You have tried telling yourself to stop thinking. It has never once worked.

The last chapter of Making Space is about exactly this, and its answer is not to fight the mind. It is to give the mind something gentler to follow. This guide turns that chapter into a complete bedtime practice, with a script you can read to yourself, shorter versions for bad nights and a week-long experiment.

Why the mind will not switch off

The book describes the mind as a recording that plays day and night. We think of this and that, and it is hard to stop. With a real recording you press stop and get silence. With thinking there is no button.

So the book suggests something else. Instead of trying to press stop, put your attention somewhere kind, and let the recording fade on its own. That somewhere is your body.

What deep relaxation is

Deep relaxation is a lying-down practice. You use what the book calls the ray of your mindfulness to scan through the body, bringing attention to each part, embracing it, and sending it care as you breathe in and out. If a part needs healing, you stay with it longer. The book says the practice is worth doing even if you do not sleep, because it nourishes you and lets you rest.

Set up your bed first

These are our suggestions:

• Dim the lights and put your phone out of reach.
• Lie on your back with your arms at your sides, or as comfortable as you can be.
• Let the bed hold you up. You do not have to hold yourself.
• Use a light blanket. Being too warm or too cold will get in the way.

A full script, in plain words

Read it slowly to yourself, or record it in your own voice and play it back. Leave a full breath after each line.

Arrive. Breathe in. Breathe out. Feel your belly rise and fall. Feel the weight of your body on the bed, and let the bed take it.

Eyes. Bring your attention to your eyes. Let the small muscles around them loosen. Smile to your eyes. They have looked at the world all day, and it is nice to thank them.

Mouth, jaw and throat. Let your lips part a little. Let the jaw drop. Let a soft smile spread on your face, and let the throat be open.

Shoulders. Breathe in and notice your shoulders. Breathe out and let them fall, as if you were putting down a heavy bag.

Arms and hands. Let your arms feel heavy. Let your fingers uncurl.

Heart. Bring your attention to your heart. The book points out that your heart has been beating for you night and day, often while you neglected it. Rest your attention there for a few breaths and smile to it, with thanks.

Belly and liver. Let your belly be soft. The book also names the liver, and asks you to hold it with tenderness, as another part of the body that works quietly for you.

Legs, ankles and feet. Let your thighs get heavy. Let the calves and ankles soften. Feel the feet.

Toes. Wiggle them a little if you want, and let the tension run out through them.

The whole body. Breathe in and out and feel yourself becoming light, like a leaf on still water. There is nowhere to go and nothing to do. The book uses the image of a cloud floating in the sky. Choose the image that suits you.

That is the whole practice. It takes ten to fifteen minutes when you go slowly.

If you only have two minutes

The book says that when there is no time for the full practice, you can choose one or two parts of the body to relax. Here is a two-minute version: jaw, shoulders, hands. Three breaths for each.

If you wake at night

• Do not check the clock. It gives the mind fuel.
• Start again from the breath, and choose the part of the body that is most tense.
• If you are still awake after the scan, stay with the breath. Rest is still happening.

If you fall asleep partway through

That is fine. You did not fail the practice. It did what you were hoping for.

Record your own voice

The book suggests making a personal recording to follow. A few tips: speak slower than feels natural, leave long pauses, keep your voice low and warm, and record it in the evening when you are already a little tired.

Doing it with your family

The book says deep relaxation can be done with others at any time. One person leads, using cues like those above. After the scan, the leader can play music or sing softly for a few minutes, then leave a moment of silence. Then everyone comes back to their breathing and the belly rising and falling, becomes aware of the arms and legs, and perhaps moves them and stretches a little. Finally everyone rolls onto one side, sits up, and stands when ready. Children usually enjoy being the leader.

A seven-night experiment

Keep a tiny note beside the bed. Each morning write one number from 1 to 5 for how rested you feel, and one word for the night.

• Night 1. Do the full script.
• Night 2. Do it again, faster.
• Night 3. Try only jaw, shoulders and feet.
• Night 4. Use your own recording.
• Night 5. Do it half an hour earlier.
• Night 6. Do it on the sofa before bed and then go to sleep.
• Night 7. Read your notes and decide what to keep.

Common mistakes

• Checking whether it is working. The checking wakes you up.
• Trying to force sleep. The practice is rest. Sleep may follow.
• Rushing through the body. Slower is better.
• Judging a bad night. Try again tomorrow.

A note on sleep problems

This practice is a way to rest, not a treatment. If you have trouble sleeping for weeks, wake often or feel unwell in the day, see a doctor. Do not stop or change any medicine without medical advice.

Try it tonight

Lie down, feel the bed and take five slow breaths. Then move through eyes, jaw, shoulders, heart and feet, smiling to each. If you want daytime breathing practice, read Mindful Breathing Exercise, or try our slow 4-7-8 pattern on the breath pacer.

This article is general educational information about a relaxation practice, not medical advice.